Healthcare and Healing
"I can't find a heart beat. I'm sorry, but you have had a spontaneous abortion." I felt hollow and empty as those words echoed inside of my head. No heart beat? How could that be? As I struggled over the next few weeks to deal with the questions that bombarded me and tortured me, "What did I do wrong? What could I have done differently?" I realized I had been given healthcare, but what I needed was healing. When I got pregnant again I was assaulted by anxiety, and I knew that I could not go back to the same Doctor's office it left me feeling cold and clinical. I needed to find healthcare that could offer me a human touch, where I could be a person with feelings and not just a patient or a chart number. I chose Midwives because they cared for me as a person. My midwife didn't just answer my questions she also addresses my feelings and ease my fears. They couldn't perform magic, but I was confident they would do whatever was possible to encourage and support my pregnancy. This was my moment.